The realization of an opportunity lost

I have finally graduated from high school. On May 26th I accomplished a nearly a thirteen-year goal; of course there were additional academic and various goals in the previous years. I am proud of my accomplishments; proud of my legacy; and proud of what I became, especially in the past four years. Naturally there are things I wish I had done differently.

One particular acquaintance comes to mind; in all probability, one I may never see again. We have had just one class together, and I recall only two or three collective conversations. Sure “Mach” believes in God, but he wants nothing to do with Him. I remember one occasion late this year “Mach” and another underclassman, “Jake”, were debating the true purpose of life. I was so proud of “Jake” in his attempts to convince “Mach”, his superior, that he was doing it all wrong. “Mach” claimed to want nothing more from life than to have fun (women, money, speed, sex, and hangovers). “If I end up in Hell, well... at least I had a good time here; and I know all my sinning friends will be there with me.” I knew if I joined in the discussion “Mach” would have not only NOT listened to me, but perhaps stopped listening to “Jake”. Here I sit with the realization that I may never have another opportunity to witness to “Mach” and to numerous others I know are rootless and moving in the wrong direction. I feel I have lost my chances with those I have “left behind”, but I pray God will send one who will take advantage of the opening that I missed.

As time goes on and things change..

Thursday was the 7 month anniversary of Ryan's death. As expected, it was a difficult day. No one ever anticipates losing a friend; you just always assume they will be there.

Eldine D. Landis. He was the man I always thought would be around. He was like a rock, conquered by nothing and defeated in the end only by tragic accident. But God took a man who was ready to go. He is smiling big now. I loved his smile, his unmistakable laugh. Eldine meant alot to many people, he meant alot to the Lord, and the Lord meant alot to him. I never told him how much he meant to me (you think I would have learned by now), but he always told me how special I was, how proud he is of me. "Jesus loves ya Jewel, I love ya. Stay strong." Now he is watching over me, and I hope that I can still make him proud. I want to be strong for him. He was like my Grandpa. I will miss those big strong arms who always reach so perfectly around me. It is still hard to believe. We share a pew every Sunday. When I go to church and he isn't there, and it's just me and Jessie.. then it will be reality.


Although my loved ones will depart, my Lord will always be beside me and for that I praise His name. My God is amazing. He is miraculous. He is awe-inspiring. He is tremendous. My God is indeed great. I have found him to be my rock and shelter. In Him I find strength, joy, peace. He is always there. He is faithful. My God is my everthing.


Psalm 121 ~ I lift my eyes up to the hills - where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the maker of Heaven and Earth.

Los instrucciones para división larga

Si se gustaría conocer los instrucciones para división larga, se los diré.
If you would like to know the instructions for long division, I will tell them to you.

Los instrucciones para división larga
(The instructions for long division)
Los cinco pasos básicos estan:
(The five basic steps are:)
1. dividir (divide)
2. multiplicar (multiply)
3. sustraer (subtract)
4. anotar (bring down)
5. repetir o permanecer (repeat or remain)

Por ejemplo: 947 / 2
novecientos y cuarenta y siete dividí por dos.
(For example: 947/2)

Dividan el numero dos en el primero numero del dividendo. Este es nueve.
(Divide two into the first number of the dividend. This is nine.)

Crean cuantos los dos encajare en nueve.
(Think how many twos will fit into nine.)

Escriban el numero sobre exactamente el numero en que dividieron, el nueve.
(Write the number directly above the number you divided into, the nine.)

Multipliquen el divisor y el primero numero en el cociente, cuatro y dos.
(Multiply the divisor and the first number in the quotient, four and two.)

Escriban su respuesta sobre exactamente el numero en que dividieron
(Write your answer directly under the nine or the number you just divided into.)

Tracen una línea debajo del ocho.
(Draw a line under the eight.)

Tracen una línea de sustracción al lado del ocho y sustraigan nueve menos ocho.
(Draw a subtraction line next to the eight and subract nine minus eight.)

Escriban su respuesta sobre exactamente el ocho.
(Write your answer directly below the eight.)

Vayan al numero próximo en el dividendo.
(Go to the next number in the dividend.)

Escriban una flecha sobre el cuatro.
(Write an arrow under the four.)

Anoten el cuatro abajo al uno.
(Bring the four down next to the one.)

Aquí es donde decidan repetir los cinco pasos o permanecer.
(Here is where you decide to repeat the five steps or to remain.)

Si su divisor puede dividir en su numero nuevo, catorce, o si tienen los numeros en el dividendo que no han anotado, repetan los los cinco pasos de división larga.
(If your divisor can divide into your new number, 14, or if you have numbers in the dividend that you have not brought down, you repeat the five steps of divison.)

Dividan dos en su numero nuevo, catorce.
(Divide 2 into your new number, 14.)

Escriban su respuesta sobre el cuatro en su cociente.
(Place your answer directly above the 4 in your quotient.)

Multipliquen su divisor, dos, con su numero nuevo en su cociente, seite.
(Multiply your divisor, 2, with your new number in the quotient, seven.)

Escriban su respuesta sobre exactamente el catorce.
(Place your answer directly under the fourteen.)

Tracen una línea debajo del catorce segunda.
(Draw a line under the second fourteen.)

Tracen una línea de sustracción al lado del catorce segunda y sustraigan, ese es cero.
Draw a subtraction line beside the second fourteen and subtract, this is zero.

Escriban un cero sobre de la línea y escriban una flecha sobre el numero próximo, seite.
(Write a zero under the line and draw an arrow under the next number, seven.)

Anoten el seite al lado del cero.
(Bring the seven down next to the zero.)

Dividan su dos en el seite y escriban su respuesta al lado de cuarenta y siete.
(Divide your two into the seven and write your answer next to the fourty-seven.)

Multipliquen su divisor con su numero nuevo en su cociente, tres.
(Multiply your divisor into your new number in the quotient, three.)

Escriban su repuesta, seis, sobre el numero seite.
(Write your answer, six, under the number seven.)

Tracen una línea debajo del numero seis.
(Draw a line under the number six.)

Tracen una línea de sustracción al lado del seis y sustraigan.
(Write your subtraction sign next to the six and subtract.)

Escriban su repuesta sobre el numero seis, ese es uno.
(Write your answer under the number six, this is one.)

No repitan los cinco pasos de división porque no hay más numeros a anotar y dos no se dividirán en uno.
(You do not repeat the steps of divison because there are no more numbers to bring down and two will not divide into one.)

El numero restante será el resto.
(The remaining number becomes the remainder.)

¡El fin!
(The end!)

The best day in Ecuador.

One morning, our second work day and last day in Cuenca, my sister and I worked with a few groups from our team, Geovanni (the local pastor) and Alex (or "Abuelo"). After about an hour of nothingness, as low-labor work was minimal and women culturally do not participate in heavier work, I made a joke to my sister in reference to some sewing work and the boys caved in to let two weak girls assist in the hefty construction. I proved myself well by mixing cemento and Giovanni actually replaced one of "the men" with myself. We dug a small 100'x1'x6" (ish?) trench along one side of the small blue tent church. This was in order to prevent flooding into the church, as it rains heavy and often in the mountains. In the process, James, a fellow team member and co-worker, busted a water pipe, which put us about an hour behind in our labor efforts. Soon it was time to leave for lunch, so our muddy work crew clung for our lives to the exterior of Geovanni's beaten truck as he drove us through the rough and flooded mountain streets. After dinner our team left for the hotel to clean and going shopping; while James, John, Jessie and myself (the "super crew") chose instead to join Geovanni and Abuelo back at the church and complete our construction project. Abuelo taught me how to line the trench molding with concrete and later to patch. I learned quickly and took pleasure in showing up James and John ("sons of thunder"). I had so much fun working in the mud, and at times rain. Abuelo and Giovanni called me "China" after some strong women's wrestler. I resented the title at first, but soon realized it was more appealing than Grandpa or Fatty as other's attained nicknames. It was about another three hours of work and finally we were finished. Giovanni and his wife, Christine, wanted to reward our hard work and effort and what they considered a sacrifice of our fun time to serve and to give. We cleaned up some and relaxed in their house, and then we piled in the truck and after a 30 minute drive to a large shopping market. Geovanni took us on am astounding tour of the most beautiful and breath-taking sites in Cuenca. We traveled into the mountains and up to the highest spot in Cuenca. It was the most inconceivable view of the entire city. Here Abuelo actually proposed to my sister. Had it not been a ridiculous request for a twenty-eight-year-old man, living in Ecuador to ask an eighteen-year-old girl from the States, whom he has only known for five days, it would have been quite romantic and maybe even perfect, also if not for us six bystanders and James with his video camera. We also saw a grande speed-rushing river and some statue things. We walked the mall and had pizza and ice cream, which was relatively delicious. If you are ever in Latin America, especially the Dominican Republic or Ecuador, you must try the coco helado (or coconut ice cream). After dinner we bundled ourselves into the cab of the little truck, as opposed to Giovanni, Christine, Jael and myself in the front, and Jessie and the three boys rode in the back. John sat on James’ lab with Christine and the car seat in the second row, I sat straddling the gearshift, and Jessie perched on Abuelo’s lap and mine, with Giovanni driving. It was a remarkably, absurdly, fun experience. The three in the rear played this great game of “Let us pull Jewel’s hair!!”, which made for an interesting ride. We took Abuelo to a light night seminary class at the university, which was a quite magnificent building as well. Sadly, we arrived at Hotel Tomebamba, after hours of fun, and it was time for goodbyes. I cried and Christine said I as the only vaster to ever make her cry, which… oh my word, made it even more emotional! Goodbyes are so difficult, especially when one knows there is little chance of ever meeting again. I had built such a strong relationship while serving with Giovanni and Christine, such stark connections. While in the truck we shared our testimonies and fears and dreams. I really opened up and shared about God’s calling of service upon my life and about my real fears. Christine was so encouraging and through her, God taught me real faith. Faith that He will reveal His will to me. Faith that He will guide me. Faith that He will be with me wherever I am, whether El Salvador, Haiti, Kenya, or Cambodia.

Look forward to more.


Cemento work with Abuelo.


Giovanni's truck.


The boys trying on a poncho at the market.


Our amazing group shot (-James): Jael, Christine, Abuelo, Geovanni, John, myself and Jessie.


Where good memories were made.


That fun game in the truck..


James and John getting close in the back seat.


Getting comfy with Jessie and Abuelo.

How great is our God.

I have thought an enormous deal about this most recent blog.I hope it does not appear cliché.

A TESTIMONY TO MY GOD:
My God is amazing. He is miraculous. He is awe-inspiring. He is tremendous. My God is indeed great. I have found him to be my rock and shelter. In Him I find strength, joy, peace. He is always there. He is faithful. My God is my everthing.

The following is an excerpt from my favorite lyrics:
Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt
Who am I, that the Bright and Morning Star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart

Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are

Who Am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love and watch me rise again
Who Am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me

I am Yours..

Romans 5:8 ~
God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
God's love is so immense.. and boundless, that while I was turned away from Him, He loved me and reached out His arms for me and sent His Son to die on the cross. That is amazing love!! He made the ultimate sacrifice and I owe my everything to a God who could never be compensated. Christ gave His everything for one who deserves nothing.

the perfect words at the perfect time

Two words for today: frustration and burden. I have never felt a stronger responsibility to reach the lost for Christ. Today was daunting and at times appeared hopeless; then came the perfect words at the perfect time and as a result I found great encouragement. Our entire class may never be united for Christ, (or for anything); but where two or three are gathered in God's name, there He is. When David was in the valley, he did not see Goliath, he saw God.
My God is big; bigger than my troubles and bigger than my giants. My God can overcome everything. He does not need me to accomplish anything, but if I allow Him, He will use even me. I must forfeit my whole self to God. I must continually look for those opportunities to be used in service. I must have the faith that He can use me. Athletes for instance have a sweet spot, a spot where they feel unstoppable and can conquer anything. I must find my sweet spot in Christ, where I can overcome any barrier to seize believers, an area where I can be truly used by Him.
(posted March 19, 2007)

You give and take away.. but blessed by Your name

Yesterday was my grandmother's 78th birthday. Her body is weak, but she is still so strong. My grandmother means the world to me. She has been there for me through everything. As I reflect upon her life and celebrate her living I cannot help but praise the Lord for what she means to me. Grandmom is a tremendous blessing upon my life! She has been my greatest encouragement in following the Lord's call upon my life to serve Him as a career missionary. She has taught me how to pray and have faith in the Lord's guidance and direction. She is an example in everything she does. Through the struggles of loss and of illness, Grandma continues to serve the Lord with a heart so dedicated and strong; she depends upon Him for her very existence.

Tomorrow would be Ryan's 16th birthday; unfortunately we lost him on October 31st of 2006. Ryan was a close friend that could never be replaced, and although he is departed his memories will never be misplaced. The days and weeks after Ryan's death were some of the hardest I have ever experienced, but God provided love and comfort through others such as: my Grandmother. Ryan meant a lot to me, but I know he meant even more to God.

Although my loved ones may come and go, the Lord will always be beside me and for that I praise His name.
(posted March 14, 2007)

Why I may or may not have a normal life in the future.

To the dismay of some and the support of others, I will not be living a happy life with my family in Indiana, in America; but, rather, I will be living a happy life with a new family in a new place, possibly very far away. I do not know where, and I do not know what I will be doing. I have pondered many "career" options, but have come to zero conclusions. I have considered a minor in Spanish, possibly going into ESL (teaching English as a 2nd language), but I am just not sure. Now, on to *Why I may or may not have a normal life in the future.*

Will my children know what it's like to get birthday money in the mail from Grandma?
Will I have a mantle to hang stockings upon? Will I have stockings?
Will my children receive report cards?
Will I be able to go to the corner store for milk and bread?
Will we know the news from the rest of the world?
Will there be good neighbor kids to play with? Will the other kids want to play with my children?
Will I be able to make Christmas cookies with my kids, like my mother always did with me and my sisters?
Will our family be in danger?
What if someone gets sick? Will there be advanced medical care near?
Will my children know their cousins and aunts and uncles and grandparents?
How readily will we be able to come in touch with home?
Will our family know the language of the people around us?

I have no idea what life will be like. I expect it to be hard. I expect (and hope) it to be challenging and stretching. I expect it to be full of joy. I expect it to be full of pain. I expect that God will be with my family through it all. Lastly, I expect that life will be normal - a new and different normal.

Why do I want to do this?? Because of this:

And this:
And this:

And this:

And this:

And this:

And this:

And lastly:




I greatly anticipate my trip to Ecuador in April and I am anxious to get a trip planned for this summer. I want to be used. I want to be stretched. I want to be confident that I am in the center of God's will for my life.

Serving Him.